Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Guest Blogger Writes Of Her Journey of Pain and Nasuea

It all got worse after my hystorectomy in june 2008, so thats where im going to start. At that time we were getting ready for my niece to come for a short visit two weeks after my surgery. My body was starting to ache all the time, i figured i was just still recovering from a level 10 vitD deficiency. I was tired most of the time still, so it made sense.

My surgery went well. But my nurses wouldnt give me my pain pills, saying i was in pain because i needed to have a bowel movement. When i explained my Dr had me do a colon cleans & that i hadnt eaten a thing since, i was then told it was from gas then and either way i needed to get up and walk.

When on the morphine drip when i first came out of surgery i told them that i was itching horribly from head to toe. They told me i was probably allergic to the soap they washed the bedding in. When i inquired as to why the itching only happend after i pushed the button, i was given the same answer - the soap. I told my Dr the next morning and she immediately changed me off the morphine and the itching ceased. I had a roommate, the nurses and cnas were all but running to answer her call bell. She mustve had great insurance, because i was on state insurance at the time and my call bell rarely was answered. So bad to the point where my roommate would push Her call button & tell them to check my light cuz i needed help and not getting any. She was a nice lady.

So i called & asked my husband to pick me up a day early, i just couldnt take the lack of treatment going on.

When i went home i was under orders to rest. HA! my baby was 2yrs old, his brother 9. His brother has always been a difficult child. The day after i got home while i had fallen asleep, he went in the back yard and tore apart the club house my husband was building with him. Plywood laying all over that side of the yard. He then carried his baby brother, who was in nothing but a diaper & no shoes, to the center of the mess surrounded by nails. He then came and told me his little brother was in the back yard. I told him thank you & went to grab the toddler. I was in complete shock when i seen what christopher had done. I told him to go grab his brother, i wasnt supposed to lift over 10lbs and he got the baby Out there fine. Anyway he tells me no, then ran into the house and locked the slider door and the front door so i couldnt get in with his brother. He came back to the slider at some point when i went to rescue the baby, i also noticed my cell was in my pocket. When i got back to the deck i set the baby down and looked up to see the older one looking at me and holding a steak knife to his throat. **please know this was not the 1st time he had done this and we had him in 3 differemt counceling programs at that time** i told him if he didnt put the knife away i was calling dad and he can deal with him all pissed off. My kid said Fine! So i called my husband and told him what was going on. I had wrapped the baby in my hoody and kept an eye on the boy inside. I informed him that his dad just started his truck to head home so this was his last chance or he Would be spanked. He threw the knife on the table next to him, flipped the door unlocked & ran lickity-split to his bedroom.

I told my husband we were in and i got of the phone. I took baby to the couch and turned on sponge bob, then went back to his brothers room.

The closer i got to his room, the louder the banging got. I entered his room right as he put his foot thru his lizards Glass aquarium, slicing his heel wide open. As i picked up the lizard i yelled "what is wrong with you!?", he just kept glaring. I bandaged him up, and he calmed down. I never did find out what the reason was for that outburst, maybe there wasnt one. Then i called his therapist to report what happend and after that i called my husband to let him know what had happend & that the storm had passed for the moment.

My husbands mother had come up to help, but had left the day before this happend.
Two weeks later my hyper high maintnance sneaky bad idea havin never sleeping niece came to stay with us. Considering i was still recovering, the agreement was that i was only to have her while my mother was at work. I already had my hands full with my son. This was not the case. We had her with us 24/7, my mother flat out told me the child was too much to handle...she really was a handful!!...but i wasnt in a position to deal with it either. But that didnt seem to matter. We had her for 6 months. (SIX!!) it was suposed to be work hours for 2weeks. Thru xmas and her 2nd birthday we had her. We had a joint party for her and my youngest who was turning 3, as their bdays are only 5 days apart. We celebrated at chuckie cheese. Both xmas and the bday party my mom got video clips of, which i thought was the time. She had my brother convinced that SHE had my niece & SHE threw the celebrations (my brother & his wife were in Tn dealing with court stuff, thats why we had my niece in oregon). I sent him pictures and told him numerous times, his friends told him, our family members all told him...and to this day he doesnt believe it. He says " why would she tell me that if she didnt have her?" Ummm.,moron!:(

My brother moved back first. My husband took 2truck loads of my nieces things over to him and our mother, you would think it would have been a tip off to my brother that my mother had duped him, and that i was not lying afterall...but nope. He wont believe it! Anyhoo, i had agreed to do daycare for him, keep my niece all week and then he came and picked her up on the weekends. He paid me once, then asked me to fill out a paper so he could get daycare payment help from wefare. I did, but was turned down for not being set up in a completely childproof home. I told him this, the next time i was owed money i was told to call welfare.

We also found out i was vitD deficient, i couldnt get out of bed one weekend:( my level was 10, and i had to get a super dose.

Then we got the news about his wife planning on moving here too with my brother and my mom. She also to this day does not believe i had her daughter 24/7. Idiot woman! But in 6 months she only called twice!! to check on her baby. Already everyone had big plans for me to take her job hunting & take her where she needed to go, because i didnt work so that meant i was free to be their taxi i supose.

My husband had had enough. He decided it was time to move away. My health was declining & they didnt seem to notice or care. His mother lived 3hrs away in a small town, her health was no good & she needed some extra help and didnt have anyone to help her, so we decided we would move by her. And then he could help her when she needed it & i could get back to taking care of me and hopefully get better. My family was not happy however, as it was inconvenient for them, we told them a whole month before we moved to find different daycare. They didnt. They bitched about how they didnt know, and how one of them was going to lose their job, even asked me if i would take my niece With us just for a couple weeks to get the wife there so she could watch my niece! My husband told them no. Enough was enough, and i love him for that!:)

That move was in 2009. Since then i have been to numerous doctors about my all over pain. It was getting worse rather than better. I hurt down to my bones:( the doctors would do all sorts of bloodtests, but everything always came back normal. I was told all sorts of blow off answers. Even told at 30yrs old that i needed to accept the fact that we all hurt more as we get older! I was like REALL!?! AT 30!?! not even... Ive been told the reason my back hurts was from carrying my fat baby, then because all young moms have low back pain, Then told it hurts because im too skinny! I now know i have a double curve scoliosis at about 30% curve & some disc degeneration:( You would think any one of the doctors i have seen would have picked up on that. But i just found out last september!

My stomach issues worsend as well. Forever being nauseus, spareatic vomiting out of nowhere (i used to have to carry a puke bag 24/7), and the pain from my chronic constipation being blamed on not drinking enough water (even though its ALL i drink!) with my tramedol. the pain was excruciating. I would feel like something kinda sharp was being dragged through my guts, my entire body would sweat profusely and make my hair drippy (ew!), and then the vomiting would start. This would happen a few times every morning, then usually i would take a warm bath as soon as i thought my stomach could handle it and that would help it calm down enough so i could smoke some medical marijuana & hold down a couple of nausea pills.

One morning in May my mom had come to stay the night & my bestie was remarrying her husband of 10yrs that afternoon and i was supposed to b a bridesmaid. But the vomiting and stomach pain would not subside. My husband checked on me while i was yet again stuck on the potty, folded in half and dripping sweat. He went and asked my mom to check on me. She talked me into suffering a trip to the ER. I weighed 217lbs at this point.

They admitted me, i missed my besties rewedding;(. Poked, prodded, xrayed & drew blood. Summed it up to an intestinal flu and after 3 days sent me home.

Things were pretty uneventful, although my oldest son was being a handful..13...ugh lol! I was working on being able to eat again and we started making plans for camping. Also i got great news that a couple of my pain drawings were accepted and being shown in an art gallery in portland, oregon! I was so excited! My first art show! July 6!

July 3rd was my 2nd admittance into the hospital for stomach pain and uncontrollable vomiting.more poking and prodding by a different doctor. This time they said it was being caused by the stress of raising my difficult child and from being stressed about my chronic fibromyalgia pain. After 5 days when i could hold down jello they sent me home again.

La dee da life goes on...

October i switched to the doctor who treated me in the hospital, and made her my pcp. I went in to see her to discuss my medications and i asked her to send me for an mri. She told me we need to think about & accept the fact that this was probably as good as it was going to get;( i told her my medications werent working well for me & she offered me methadone! I said noooo... Im scared of that crap!! So i left that appointment feeling sad & hopeless. Thats a pretty dreary outlook for someone only 33yrs old:(

A week later i was back in the hospital. Excruciating stomach pain & uncontrollable vomiting. My primary doctor was out of town, the doctor who did see me all but accused me of Dr jumping and sent me home. The next day i was still sick, so my husband called that dr who seen me the day before and asked him what to do. He said to wait until he came on shift at the ER at 7pm. So we did. His demeanor was much kinder and he was much nicer to talk to. He told me that he was going to admit me and try to figure out whats going on. Here We Go Again...

Bloodwork every 6hrs, more imaging, lots of saline & anti nausea meds. Three days later the dr comes in and tells me he thinks that my pain meds (i was on a lot at that time) was causing me an iliac, a temporarily paralized spot in my intestines. So nothing could go through, causing the stomach pain and vomiting. He said he wanted to keep me in another day or two to be sure.

Two days later my vomiting had ceased, the nausea had not yet however. I was able to eat jello and hold down water & juice. The doctor came to see me again and said he wanted to keep me another night just to make sure he isnt sending me home just to get sick again and be right back in. No problem for me!

He also kept me the next night lol! And he changed my meds and took some others away to help prevent the iliac from flaring up again.

I was down to 123lbs. Almost 100 pounds lost due to all my sickness. :(

To date i have not been back in the hospital (knock on wood quick! Lol!), i still have chronic pain from my fibromyalgia and scoliosis w/disc degeneration, and my stomach still hurts in the mornings but not making me pour sweat, or anything at all like i was having before, and the vomiting only seems to happen if my meds are making me too nauseus from an empty belly, but it has been controllable and not so bad that i have to carry a puke bag anymore.

I still have health issues, i have made that dr from my last stay my pcp, and we are learning how to manage them. He also got my state insurance to cover physical therapy! Its a miracle!!! Lol!;) i get to feeling frustrated and hopeless and he helps make that better too. For starting out as a jerk, ive found im pretty lucky to have him for my doctor. ;) hes not going to over dope me like my last doctors did, instead hes trying to Help me.

Ok, im not sure what else to write other than saying to the reader to take it day by day. Its a struggle. God gives his biggest burdens to his best angels!